triste ambulant – day 11


“This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” John 11:4


Jun 20 was the longest day.  Today is the shortest day.  And what happened between the longest day and shortest day of my life this year?

  • Friends who were friends have moved on – new friends are on the horizon
  • Family held together in support – family makes decisions to move on
  • Family was more independent – family is more dependent  
  • Professional life was important – professional life is about to be complete 
  • Faith was for climbing and working – faith is for sustenance and strength
  • It used to be two – now it is one
  • It was dealing with the results of the past – it now is dealing with a new future
  • What was meaningless was meaningful – what was meaningful is gone
  • Immediate satisfaction was important – long-term satisfaction is desired
  • It was about being happy – it is about working through grief
  • It was about holding on – it is about hanging on
  • The young were smarter – the younger have gotten hurt
  • The older were barely wise – the older are even less wise
  • It’s a given – it’s a mystery
  • I would try to do it myself – I’m not sure if I can do anything by myself
  • Acquaintances were years old – acquaintances are weeks old
  • Not enough time – too much time
  • Words meant one thing – words mean something else
  • The path forward was narrow, marked, and defined – the path forward is broad, wide, and into the fog
  • I was arrogant – I am broken
  • I cared about things – I care about very different things
  • It was noisy and busy – it is quiet and intentional
  • People depended on me – I depend on people
  • Relationships were on thin ice – relationships have broken through the ice
  • Relationships were facile – relationships are deep
  • It was about being right – it’s about accepting grace
  • It was about being hard – it’s about being able to cry easily
  • Being sympathetic – being empathetic
  • Too much intimacy – no intimacy
  • Two TV channels – one TV channel
  • Two cars – one car
  • Lots of phone calls – few phone calls
  • Fear of what might happen – realization that it did happen
  • I was me – I’m someone else

For everything there is a season,

    a time for every activity under heaven.

A time to be born and a time to die.

    A time to plant and a time to harvest.

A time to kill and a time to heal.

    A time to tear down and a time to build up.

A time to cry and a time to laugh.

    A time to grieve and a time to dance.

A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.

    A time to embrace and a time to turn away.

A time to search and a time to quit searching.

    A time to keep and a time to throw away.

A time to tear and a time to mend.

    A time to be quiet and a time to speak.

A time to love and a time to hate.

    A time for war and a time for peace.

(Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 NLT)

Seasons will come and go.  I’m somewhere in them.

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